Wow, I think I got up from bed faster than the forum right now...And I take forever to get out of bed. That's saying something. How about some stupid jokes?...
Knock Knock
Who's there?
I'm a pile up.
I'm a pile up who?
...
What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A Private Tutor!
Yeah, I'm bored...
It's obvious, those were the worst jokes I've ever had the misfortune to read...
Perhaps you should read a book? Or play a game?
A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch.
He picks it up and throws it across the street.
A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch.
The snail looks up and says, "What the heck was *that* all about?"
I have to do a research paper, but I've been working on it for an hour...I need a break.